A different level

I would appreciate advice esp from married ladies as to exactly how I might play my current situation.

I am now totally exclusive to my b/f and have been for almost 5 months, although my husband and I hadn't had sex for a very long time before that. I don't even like my husband seeing me in my underware, that's for my lover and nobody else. Obviously hubbie and I live in the same house and oversights do occur and to be fair he does now understand the situation completely. All that sounds a little harsh but hubbie and I do get on extremely well in all other areas.

It's still early doors though in our situation and hubbie and I are still finding our feet a little but I do want him to get something from all of this and wish to consider his needs as well as my own but he's still a little shy in comming forward and opening up but recently I feel I have latched on to something in his attitude and would like maybe to explore this avenue. I am a competent seamstress and was putting the finishing touches to a yellow swishy salsa dress I making for a dance friend. I asked hubbie if he'd mind popping it on and standing on the dinning room table to enable me to pin up the hem nice and level. We had a bit of giggle and a laugh and whilst I was pinning it he wouldn't keep still so I playfully slapped his legs and told him to KEEP STILL! Instant obedience. He was like a statue and didn't move once not even talking. On another occasion I was due to meet my lover and was running late the atmosphere was a little tense and I was a bit snappy and mean, get this get that, he did everything without I asked uttering a word. It gave me a bit of a rush to be honest but I was more concerned with being late, but on the way out I just casually mentioned would mind tidying my bedroom a bit as there was make up wipes everywhere, hairdrier and straighteners out just a general mess. He said nothing and wished me a good time. When I returned early the next day I was flabbergasted! The bed had been changed and made beautifully and turned down, my nightie was laid out ready for me to put on and the room smelt devine. It was a real pleasure to slip between clean sheets and drift off after an exhausting evening in my new silky nightie. Even more was to follow. He awoke me at about 2pm with a nice cup of tea and we talked for a while, not about my evening but just general stuff, then I noticed the clothes I had discarded on the floor before taking to my bed had gone. I asked him where they were and he said he had washed them. I asked him to go down stairs as I wanted to dress and would be down in 20 mins. I opened my wardrobes to get something to wear and he'd done tidying in there too! Dresses and skirts hung neatly going from dark to light, shoes placed cordinatingly below the appropriate dresses (as far as possible I have hundreds of shoes!) I then went to my draws, all my underware was neatly folded and placed in separate draws, sensibles in one dates night pretties in another and all my hosiery in the bottom. I couldn't believe it, it must have taken him hours!

But last week I think the penny finally dropped with me. Last Saturday I went to a fancy dress shop in Weston super Mare to look for an outfit for another dance event that I couldn't be bothered to make. As I turned the pages of their stock book we came across a maids outfit, I jokingly said " I'm going to get one of those for you if you carry on looking after me the way you have recently" he said nothing not even a facial reaction. Then last night as I was getting ready again (late again) I asked him if he'd mind doing a little ironing for me whilst I was out he said he didn't then said "Angela, where you serious on Saturday about that maids dress?" Nooooo I said leaving hastily giggling a bit.

I now feel a bit mean and wonder if this is the type of dominance he wants from me, I'm getting everything and more from this new arrangement of ours and feel I would like to do something from him. Trouble is I'm just not dominant natured and do I really want my husband flirting about in a maids outfit? What would you do ladies?
It would be very easy here for me to say go for it, buy the maids gear and give him what he obviously craves. However I feel communication and take things a little more slowly would be a better idea. Have you ever asked him why he tided your bedroom like he did whilst you were with you b/f? This maybe the key to him opening up to you.

Try giving him a few more little chores to do whilst your out just to check it wasn't a one off and see how that goes, try a little humility whilst your out together, maybe ask him if your b/f would like this dress or that lingerie whilst your our shopping together and test his reaction just take it slowly. Then every now and again just make a little comment about the maid thing whilst trying to reassure him that's it's Ok.

After all a volunteer is better than pressed man any day and I feel the best maid for you would be one trained in the way you would like them to be.

And if none of that works give me a call anytime!
Wonderful. Seems you have totally destroyed a functioning male. And you dont even think thats a problem. What i dont get is why the fuck these guys keep taking this shit...
Anyway, you have successfully turned a productive member of society into a good for nothing